7.5.15

Unknowing a Person

There's this person I used to know.

He was a boy. He's guy. My guy. He used to be. I imagined him many times being my man. My future one. My only. But other times - I don't. Because he tends to act like a kid at times.

One night we had a fight,
and I cannot go back.

I've never missed anyone's company like this. Not a family. Not a friend made me feel this way. Not to the extent that tears would fall off my eyes. Up until this day I thought I'm insensitive or heartless. Or maybe I just remember someone who used to say I am.

As days passes by, weeks, and months, it's becoming more and more clear to me that all the things I knew with the person and about the person are slowly fading.

My hair now - shorter.
My weight - heavier.

I'm slowly learning that all quotes are not good compared to when it is personally experienced.
"Time heals all wounds," said in the Little Prince. One of my all-time favorite quotes. But I have not felt it intensely like how I am feeling it now. Time is healing me at the moment. All the wounds - hurtful words, the long days of ignoring each other, the cries and tears, the raising of voices, etc.

No amount of hard liquor bottles, shopping sprees and endless escapades would guarantee a painless break-up.

For now, this is all I want to say.